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New Year, New Lines to Go With This Life

Merry...Oh No, No

Everyone thinks you're okay, You'd think they'd know better by now...

Anything else going to happen?

Well, I know that I haven't posted in a while and there has been so much going on. Although, I do believe that I said that I would post more. Unfortunately, regarding that and many other things, that did not go my way. 

Here's the run down on everything since I last posted:

Cons

- My cousin tried to commit suicide and therefore, I tried to step up but that got thrown into my face. Through in some trash talk and everything would see just about normal. 

- I have started a new relationship and I'm entirely too confused about it for my own good.

- The Christmas holiday is right around the corner and I am not likely the thought of so much family around one place. I used to be cheerful about it until last March, when my daddy died. I didn't even want to decorate this year, which is a miracle for me!

- My new puppy gave me a scare. She had cradle cap (yes, dogs do get it. I did not know this either at the time. Thought she had a rash), and ended up getting sick an the only reason I can think of is because she ate some human food and that it did not agree with her. She's fine now, thankfully...

Pros

- I have lost more weight! I now weight 210, which I am loving this new look that I have on things. 

- Got my puppy back to health.

- Got into a new relationship and even though I am confused about some things, I am happier than I was before it started.

Anybody else notice all the Cons and little Pros? 

Yea, so did I. 

Quote of the Day:

"This mirror gave me an infection mental devils draining me

Waging war cause my reflection is the enemy I see

Shatter every mirror, destroy each camera lens

Ensure that I will never have to see its face again."

- Picture Me Broken, "Torture"

(DISCLAIMER: (1) This blog is for my updating purposes only. It is not used to direct people into the same exact situation as myself. Caution should be known when trying the same ideas as my own. I do not recommend nor do I encourage individuals to try this. I take responsibility for myself and the actions of myself; not others.
(2) The ideas in this blog come from my own mind. The quotes are from their own individual authors. I do not take responsibility for the author's ideas in these quotes.)

It's Been A While

New Beat To Things

Sorry it has been a few days since I have written or updated anything. I seem to be running everywhere nowadays, especially to my finals. My classes are almost over and I couldn't be more excited with another semester done and gone and things just seem to be looking up from here.

I now weight 224 pounds and the weight seems to be melting away. Food just seems to be an object to me and now hunger pains are just something in the past. I thought that everyday would be as hard as the last but that doesn't seem to be the truth. I know that I'll have hard days before me but I couldn't be more excited.

And confusing my immune system...? Has worked like a charm! I always burn as many calories as I take in to make sure that I can get the maximum weight loss possible and I'm just getting closer to my goal and this week has seemed to go by extremely fast. I used to sit and wonder why time was so slow since I started all of this but now that does not seem to be the case.

I'm not trying to sugar coat how hard this is. It is still hard but now that I have become busy, I don't seem to think about things, such as food, like I used to. I may become hungry but I don't have much time or the patience to wait for it. I was able to overcome my plateau and get closer to my weight loss goal and that just makes me want to succeed even more. 

I can finally say that I am proud of myself but the hard road isn't over yet. I have over 100 pounds to go and that may take me a while but I know that by continuing what I am doing, I'll be able to reach my goal in a timely manner. I don't want to become obsessed or anything, and so I'm going to take one obstacle at a time.

Tips to Losing Weight... Like I have Been:

- Drink 64 ounces of water a day. (Equivalent to 4 regular sized water bottles.) Sip them throughout the day, do not drink it all at once. If you do, you will bloat and more than likely gain all water weight and feel miserable.

- Drink plenty of things with antioxidants. This confuses your immune system and your body will not go into "starvation mode." Also, the hunger pains won't be like they would be if you did not eat or drink anything all day.

- Get plenty of sleep. The more you sleep, the less the hunger pains will feel. Your body will be more relaxed and you will not feel compelled to eat and feel guilty.

- Exercise, exercise, exercise. You may not like the thought of it at all but if you want to burn more fat and calories, that is the best way to do it. Start out doing 30 minutes 3-5 times a weeks and increase the days and time increments as you go along so you don't get stuck at weight plateaus. You burn fat through energy and so when you sweat, good bye fat!

- When you do eat and get those tiny calories that are so dreadful, keep it all healthy! Eating an entire cucumber has less calories to those jolly ranchers that you have been snacking on and healthy foods help eat fat, especially blueberries and grapefruit. You'll be able to lose the fat, and not worry about losing muscle tone. 

- Keep yourself busy. If it is a slow day for me, I feel like I need to eat otherwise I don't know if I will survive. Sad, I know, but deep inside everyone, I'm sure that is true for them also. Read a book or just clean the house and if all fails, just take a small nap to get things off of your mind. You don't want to feel guilty and not eat anything the next day in hopes of that may help. It's doubtful because then you've started starvation mode and your body slows down.

These tips have definitely worked for me and I thought that I would share them with my audience. I learned the hard way, as many of you have and so any tips can always be helpful sometimes. I have lost 13 pounds in two weeks and this is what I have followed and I have over stepped each plateau that I have reached. 

Quotes of the Day:

"A hard beginning maketh a good ending."

- John Heywood 

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."

- Lao-Tzu

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."

- Seneca

"He who chooses the beginning of the road chooses the place it leads to. It is the means that determines the end."

- Harry Emerson Fosdick

(DISCLAIMER: (1) This blog is for my updating purposes only. It is not used to direct people into the same exact situation as myself. Caution should be known when trying the same ideas as my own. I do not recommend nor do I encourage individuals to try this. I take responsibility for myself and the actions of myself; not others.

(2) The ideas in this blog come from my own mind. The quotes are from their own individual authors. I do not take responsibility for the author's ideas in these quotes.)

You Don't Get What You Want, You Get What You Work For.

Motivational Pictures

(COURTESY BY TUMBLR AND GOOGLE)

Sometimes it is always good to get a reminder of what this is all about and what your goals are. That is exactly what I did today. 

I got up at 3pm today, which was a huge accomplishment for me. I am usually not the one to sleep in this late. But I am trying to sleep as much as I can since the hunger pains aren't nearly s bad as they were in the beginning and I don't get any headaches anymore. 

This seems to be a slow journey for me, but I am willing to make progress with that. Since I am only 20 years old, what else do I have to look forward to in my life? It all leads down to this moment and if I wait any longer, it will be harder for me to lose the weight so I would rather get it done now and keep the weight off.

What I have ate/drinks today:

- Banana: 45 calories

- Mountain Dew (did not finish): about 100 calories

I am pretty proud of myself. I want to accomplish so much with my life and so this is where it all begins. A year from now, I want to be able to be a size 7 and live my life to the fullest. I keep trying to confuse my immune system and so far it has been working. I drink lots of water and take green tea tablets. These help my out a lot and I use steam for my green tea. I do have to say though, I don't have to worry much about groceries. Hunger pains are something that I have grown used to and now I am just waiting for the weight to fall off and exercising has helped me a lot.


Quotes of the Day:

"First say to yourself what you would be;

and then do what you have to do."

- Epictetus

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined."

- Henry David Thoreau

(DISCLAIMER: (1) The pictures shown above are not of my property. Each picture belongs to their own persons and are used for educational purposes ONLY. I do not take credit for each of the artist(s) work or their findings. 

(2) This blog is for my updating purposes only. It is not used to direct people into the same exact situation as myself. Caution should be known when trying the same ideas as my own. I do not recommend nor do I encourage individuals to try this. I take responsibility for myself and the actions of myself; not others.)

Tell Me Something New.

How I Feel...

Everybody that I seem to talk to talks about one thing; how this is unhealthy for me and how my emotions are probably corrupted. Sorry, but this became a test of will power. It failed the first few times but I'll be damned if I don't succeed now. 

Why does everything have to be so damn negative? Can't people see the positive in all of this? I have lost 7 pounds this week and I couldn't have been more proud of my self. Yea, it is more than scientists recommend but did you ever think that they could be wrong? Scientists are always conducting studies about this and I have read enough to know that they don't have enough and I am tired of being fed bullshit. 

I may be wrong but I am not too proud to admit it. I know that I could be wrong in doing this but I am needing this badly. I had the LapBand surgery almost two years ago and I have almost 50 pounds on just it and I did the entire diet and exercise routine. It just didn't work for me. I'm sick and even more tired of pretending this is how I want my life to be. 

You are only young once, so why not live it to the fullest and the way that you want to? I want to be thin and a little careless. I have lived my entire life my someone else's plan and now I want to run free and be able to make my own decisions. I want so many wonderful things for myself but I need this for myself first and once that is achieved, I don't know what I'll do next. I may go to King's Island and not worry about fitting into one of those roller coaster harnesses or go to the beach for the first time and wear a bathing suit and not worry about what people say. 

I may not have children now but I may want them someday. I wan to be healthy and live as long as I can for them and be able to play with them. I don't want to have to stay inside and be ashamed of being in public with me. Getting the picture now? there is so many things that I dream for myself and there is something that can be achieved from this. I can have my dreams and the life I want, just by losing all of this weight. I don't want to be the one that people look down upon anymore. I want to be the one that people look up to. Be their inspiration, not their thinspiration.


So, since I have my rant over with, here is two helpful sites to consider and to think about:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2012/feb/18/fasting-protect-brain-diseases-scientists

http://www.fasting.com/gardner.html



Quotes of the Day:

“Someone was hurt before you, wronged before you, hungry before you, frightened before you, beaten before you, humiliated before you, raped before you…yet, someone survived…You can do anything you choose to do.”

- Maya Angelou

"The past is dead; tomorrow will become whatever decision you make."

- Sherrilyn Kenyon, "Dance With The Devil"

(DISCLAIMER: (1) These websites are not associated with my blog. The websites are used for educational purposes only. The websites belong to their individual author(s) and companies. I do not take responsibility for them. 

(2) This blog is for my updating purposes only. It is not to encourage anyone to try what I am doing. It is HIGHLY recommended that people research and take into account of their own actions. I am not responsible for you; only myself as an individual.)

Today was Something to Overcome.

Whew! It's Almost Over!

Today had definitely been a hard day for me. Although, I did not get up until 2pm. I started to feel extremely hungry around 4:30-5pm, but I took it in strides and came out proud of myself. I decided to do some window shopping instead of trying to look all over the kitchen in hopes that I'll cave and eventually eat something. 

Today I have eaten:

- 2 Bags of Apple Slices: 30 calories (From McDonalds, I know, ugh! Mom wanted some food and so we stopped but I did not cave one single bit. I just grabbed and quick snack and move right one. I felt that this was a huge step for me.)

- Cheese Head Light String Cheese: 45 calories

- Some grapes: calories unknown

So, overall I think I have done relatively good for today. I was unable to do my normal workout for the day but I did do about two hours of window shopping and so I think tat may have made up for the calories that I took in for today. 

I thought that the extremely hard days were behind me but I was wrong. This just clearly reminds me that I have a long road ahead of me and I need to stay focused on where I want to be and that is thin. Since that has always been a dream of mine, I don't think anyone or anything will over power me or undermine me. 

Although, I am being a little depressed when it comes to watching people clothing shop. I want to be able to buy clothes for myself and right now, I kind of feel selfish too. I want to be thin now and I don't understand why I couldn't have thought of this way before. Maybe, in a way, I wasn't mature enough to have this clear thinking or something. I have nought clothes over the last few years in hopes that they would help me lose the weight and get me to my goal but they never did and now I just look at clothes and I want to lose weight with a bigger passion than ever! 

It took my sister six months to lose almost 100 pounds by just smoking and drinking mountain dew. She, of course, ate when she had to but she mostly drank soda and smoked. I want to be able to do that and be thinner than she was. I want to be able to surpass everyone's expectations of me and be who I have always wanted to be. I am hoping to achieve this goal, even if it goes take me longer. As long as I am moving, I am moving forward. 


Quotes of the Day:

"You think you got the best of me

Think you've had the last laugh

Bet you think that everything good is gone

Think you left me broken down

Think that I'd come running back

Baby you don't know me, cause you're dead wrong

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

- Kelly Clarkson "Stronger"